Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Trying to be stoic

My leading job prospect for this year – the one that flew me in, at considerable expense, for a campus visit – has formally turned me down.  They let me down easy, but a no is a no.  Now there's nothing for me to do but press on with what few new job applications may come, and continue doing my research to make myself a more attractive candidate for next year's job cycle. 

I really felt like I gave my best shot at this gig; aside from niggling random worries, I can't think of anything I could have done better.  Maybe some things could have been better about me, but I did the best I could with what I had.  It was hard not to feel a little that the willingness to spend unusual coin on my airfare, as well as my warm interactions with the faculty and staff, were positive signs.  I never felt that I had the job in the bag, but I really hoped that I might, and just couldn't recognize it. 

My self-pity is tempered by the knowledge that a lot of academics, including a few who read and comment on this blog, have endured years of essentially luckless job hunting before they got anything.  I guess I have to resign myself to the reality that I'm only at the beginning of 'the lean years'.

Meanwhile, as I often do when I hit setbacks like this that fall somewhere short of tragic, I recall what Abraham Lincoln said when someone asked how he felt about losing the US senate election to Stephen Douglas: "I am like the boy who stubbed his toe: too big to cry, and too hurt to laugh."

10 comments:

  1. I am so sorry. It's hard to look back on a visit and realize that you did well while the outcome suggests otherwise. These kinds of decisions often do not adhere to the standard rules of logic, merit, or physics. Still, it doesn't help in the short term.

    I suggest a day of general moping, bubble baths, scotch, and sinfully delicious food. Then, you pick up and carry on, knowing that one day, the answer will be yes. :)

    With you in spirit, pal.

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  2. Alas! I'm sorry you didn't get the job. Yeah, this part can suck even worse than the early part of the season where nobody offers you interviews. Sigh. I have no help, only sympathy. I hope you have some booze and good food.

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  3. OOh, and at the campus visit stage, you can do everything perfectly fine and they like you and you were great, but they can only hire one person and they had to make a decision based on something. It actually doesn't mean you didn't hit it out of the park! Don't think it's about you at this stage --- it's really about the weird "fit" and "value-added" stuff.

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  4. Oy. That sucks. *pours you a virtual drink*

    It can be hard to keep on keepin' on, as they say, but it's necessary. At least you're back in RC, and have plenty to distract you. Sending you many positive vibes for the future.

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  5. It does sound as if you need a drink...and a strong one. I'd agree with Sisyphus while everything went well..it was down to the point where its the 'fit' and 'value added stuff'.

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  6. I'm sorry. That just always sucks.

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  7. Ugh. I'm sorry, K. I'll pour one for you myself.

    Here's to good times in RC in the meanwhile.

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  8. Oh, Dr K, that sucks! I'm so sorry. It seems like your head is in the right place--let this be motivation to make yourself even awesomer, and the right job will come, even if it is next year. In the meantime, cocktails. Lots of cocktails.

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  9. (((((((Dr. K))))))))

    Their loss. Definitely.

    I hope the next one is THE one.

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  10. Boo! But email me if you have any duty free requests. I'll try to purchase extra special cocktail ingredients :-)

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