I got an email today from one of my soon-to-be-colleagues at Cute-as-a-Button University, asking to confirm my teaching assignments. I looked over it, and it all seemed good. They even list old syllabi of the intro course written by other professors, which come in very handy for gauging what people expect, and what sorts of texts and assignments are favored. In the process of reviewing these syllabi, I noticed and then slooowwly realized that I was being assigned not to teach my usual intro – call it Introduction to Pseudology – but the other intro course for the department. I will have to teach one section each semester of Introduction to Libel and Slander. This is a much more, well, sciencey kind of pseudology, one that is very far distant from the broad segment of the discipline that I usually think of as the whole. And, uh, I'm not well schooled in it.
Last time I took a course in Libel was 1997. It was an undergrad course. The intro course, in fact.
Last time I took a course in Slander was, oh, MOTHERFUCKING NEVER!! FUCK ME WITH A CHAINSAW!!!!!!
I'm trained in Pseudology, for heaven's sake! You know, the non-sciencey pseudology! This is one of those situations in which one's CV can unintentionally raise a bid that one meant to stand pat on. Technically, I have taught several semesters of Intro to Libel in grad school, but really, I was a TA in an excessively computerized course. I was more of a computer lab monitor than a regular TA. And sure, I had to read the textbook, but I really had to read it, not just review and skim. And probably half the information that I learned (and forgot) has been made obsolete by later findings anyway.
The closest I've ever gotten to Slander is in having some good friends and drinking buddies in grad school who are trained Slanderers. Couldn't tell you too much about their work, but I can state on good authority that they can hold their liquor. Somehow, this seems inappropriate knowledge to impart to freshmen.
And, because I a) put all that on my CV, b) I blithely agreed in my campus visit to teach this course because I'm a fucking idiot, and misunderstood the course as broad enough in scope to use an adjusted form of my current intro syllabus, and c) I've accepted the job and have no intention of backing out of that, I've gotta string together something. My entire current intro syllabus, which I have crafted and smithed over the course of three years, is completely useless for this purpose. Virtually all of my theory knowledge, never mind my methodological training, is irrelevant to this class.
I think I have a lot of reading to do this summer.
Last time I took a course in Libel was 1997. It was an undergrad course. The intro course, in fact.
Last time I took a course in Slander was, oh, MOTHERFUCKING NEVER!! FUCK ME WITH A CHAINSAW!!!!!!
I'm trained in Pseudology, for heaven's sake! You know, the non-sciencey pseudology! This is one of those situations in which one's CV can unintentionally raise a bid that one meant to stand pat on. Technically, I have taught several semesters of Intro to Libel in grad school, but really, I was a TA in an excessively computerized course. I was more of a computer lab monitor than a regular TA. And sure, I had to read the textbook, but I really had to read it, not just review and skim. And probably half the information that I learned (and forgot) has been made obsolete by later findings anyway.
The closest I've ever gotten to Slander is in having some good friends and drinking buddies in grad school who are trained Slanderers. Couldn't tell you too much about their work, but I can state on good authority that they can hold their liquor. Somehow, this seems inappropriate knowledge to impart to freshmen.
And, because I a) put all that on my CV, b) I blithely agreed in my campus visit to teach this course because I'm a fucking idiot, and misunderstood the course as broad enough in scope to use an adjusted form of my current intro syllabus, and c) I've accepted the job and have no intention of backing out of that, I've gotta string together something. My entire current intro syllabus, which I have crafted and smithed over the course of three years, is completely useless for this purpose. Virtually all of my theory knowledge, never mind my methodological training, is irrelevant to this class.
I think I have a lot of reading to do this summer.
Mwahahahaha love the post title!
ReplyDeleteDoes this mean Foucault will not be on your summer reading list?
Good luck and don't forget to contact your grad school friends for some help and any recent syllabi stuff. This will broaden your cv and make your teaching chops look snazzy! (although it will be painful this summer/year --- just work through the pain and build those pseudology muscles).
Lemme know if I can be of any help. I got the Fruit Studies stuff down --- surely that must go on a Slander syllabus!
Oh, Sis, if only Fruit Studies were useful here! I'm no stranger to that discipline — I actually have an entire draft syllabus for Pseudology of Fruit Studies up my sleeve. There are higher-level studies like you suggest, but just like you have to crawl before you walk, you have to learn how to slander at all before you can be trusted to slander fruit.
DeleteOh, and forgot to mention: I've anticipated your first suggestion. Already put out a call to my old grad school friends on FB. Hopefully, crowd-sourcing will compensate for my crashing ignorance.
DeleteWelcome to my world. This happened to me CONSTANTLY as an adjunct, and I thought I'd be done with it on the TT. Oh, no, no, no. I had to teach YA literature in my first semester on the TT, and aside from The Hunger Games, I had nothing to teach. The bad news is that this sort of situation is über stressful. The good news is that after you teach a class or two like this -- ones where you have little to no knowledge -- you can teach damn near anything. That makes you more marketable for future jobs. Good luck! At least you realized this now instead of in August.
ReplyDeleteAs Fie said, that's very common for Lit people. In the past 5 years, I've become an expert in Colonial Latin American lit and culture. Even though my field is late XXth and XXIth century Latin American literature and cinema. And let's not go into the course where half of it was Medieval Spanish literature.
ReplyDeleteSomething similar happened to me for next year (thankfully, in the spring semester).
ReplyDeleteI'm not entirely sure what Into to Libel and Slander is, but if it has anything to do w/ stats or research methods hit me up. I have an entire semester's worth of material I can give you.
Also, get a syllabus from one of your new colleagues who has taught this, so as to get an idea of what their expectations are. You can do this!
You already know how to do this, so I won't add here, except to say that the further folks go into pseudology and fruit studies, the more entertaining! Who knew you could slander fruit!
ReplyDeleteI know, right? That may be the very best phrase that my pseudonymous blogging has ever generated.
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